Cloth nappies: saving money and saving the environment

Nappies, nappies, nappies. So much of your time as a parent is spent surrounded by nappies! So why not blog about nappies? Not just any nappies. This week (or fortnight) is Cloth Nappy Week in New Zealand and as I am a total fan of cloth nappies, it seemed only appropriate that I share a bit on the topic. I'll try and keep it to just that, a bit, but I have a lot to say about cloth nappies. I'm someone who is generally labelled as quiet (yet I write a blog???), but this is one topic where I find it hard to contain my enthusiasm for the subject, but I will do my best.

Before you grimace in horror at the thought of using cloth nappies, let me reassure you that cloth nappies, or modern cloth nappies (MCN), no longer refers to those big, white, complicated to fold nappies that our mothers and grandmothers used back in the day. MCNs are fitted, compact, easy to use and come in a range of super cute designs.

In fact, when it comes to MCNs, the options are so endless that it can be a bit of a problem trying to get your head around everything when you first start out. I know I encountered this when I began delving into the world of MCNs. I did so much reading on different nappy systems (terms like prefold, fitted, pocket, snap in, all in ones soon become quite familiar), whether to use sized or one size fits all and what type of insert to use (cotton, microfiber, hemp, bamboo to name a few). Confused already? Don't worry, there is an amazing New Zealand website, The Nappy Lady, that lays out everything you need to know in a very readable and user friendly way.

I could share all the information I have gained from my readings but I did promise to try and contain myself, so if you are looking into MCNs (and I really think you should) then visit this website. Instead, I thought I'd share a couple of very convincing reasons for using cloth nappies and a few tips I have picked up from my experience so far.

So jumping straight into it, why use MCNs? For me, there were two main reasons: the cost and the benefits to the environment. I'll be honest and say that if it turned out that MCNs cost more than disposables, we probably wouldn't have gone done this route because as much as we want to look after the environment, we simply don't have the funds to do this now we're down to one income. I'm jumping ahead of myself now though. Read on...

The cost

As I said, for us this was the biggest factor. When you first look into cloth nappies, you might balk at the cost. At $20-$30 a cloth nappy, it seems expensive. However it doesn't take long to see that cloth nappies are far, far cheaper than using disposables. I could lay out the costs using my own experience but really, why invent the wheel? The Nappy Lady website has done this already so I have simply borrowed my information from there. It makes for some impressive reading, and I'm only borrowing a few figures, visit the site for a more detailed breakdown of costs.

Cost of disposable for 1 child (incl. rubbish bags and wipes): $4845
Cost of cloth nappies for 1 child (incl. washing and cloth wipes): $1452.77

So using cloth nappies is a savings of $3392.23 per a child.

That is a lot of money, particularly if you're down to one income as many are. If you use your nappies for more than one child, well the savings just continue. Plus, at the end, they might be in good enough nick that you could sell them on Trade Me...trying doing that with your used disposables, not too many takers for them I would imagine!

The environment

Disposable nappies are just that, disposable. They are used once then thrown away. Great for parents, not so great for the environment. After all, our waste goes somewhere and just because we can't see it, doesn't mean it ceases to exist. For the first few weeks of Miss A's life we used disposable nappies full time and we put out at least one rubbish bag a week. Now we're on cloth full time, we might put out one bag a fortnight. That's a lot of bags not going to the dump, and we're only one household.

Those two factors add up to a pretty convincing argument to use MCNs in my opinion. It's just logical. I won't continue to push it though, rather, if you do decide to go down the MCN path, here are a few tips I have from my experience so far. Actually, even if you aren't considering MCNs read on, as not all the tips relate to cloth nappies, but just nappies in general.

#1 If possible, head along to a Nappy Lady Workshop. Here you'll be presented with so much useful information about MCNs (that comes in a handy booklet you get to take home and peruse at your leisure, because trust me, you won't be able to take it all in at the workshop), have the chance to view a huge range of nappies and best of all, come away with a pack which includes 3 different cloth nappies (worth over $90). The workshops cost $25 but hey, you get the pack worth far more so it's totally worth it.

#2 Don't buy your nappies before baby arrives! Instead, build up a collection which contains a few different types (your handy pack from #1 is the perfect base for this) and trial them first. This is not my tip but rather one I heard over and over again and am so glad that I took on board. Different nappies will suit different babies. I found the nappies I ended up with were not ones I initially would have purchased if I hadn't trialed first. I also found it incredibly helpful when friends with cloth nappies let me borrow one to two to trial...this might seem weird, sharing nappies, but really, they've been washed, they're clean, it's totally fine, and so much cheaper than buying your own just to trial. Alternatively check out Trade Me or second hand baby shops.

#3 Ease into cloth nappy use. Having a newborn is exhausting and if it is your first, there is already so much else to deal with without attempting cloth nappies too, so give yourself a few weeks to adjust first. In saying this, some people use cloth full time from the start and that's okay too. I personally started out with disposables and gradually introduced cloth nappies, first aiming to use just one cloth nappy a day, then two and after that, I had the hang of it and it was quite easy to swap over to cloth. In saying that, you don't have to use cloth full time. Some people use cloth nappies just at home, only during the day or night or maybe just one or two a day. All of these options are great, you're still saving money and putting out less rubbish, so it definitely doesn't have to be an all or nothing approach.

#4 Combine washing. Let's be honest, life with a baby consists of A LOT of washing so why would anyone in their right mind want to add more through using cloth nappies? Fair question. Well, the simple solution is to not do more washing. How? I chuck my nappies into the washing machine, put them through a rinse cycle, and then add in the rest of Miss A's washing and do a full cycle from the start. So yes, it takes extra water, but not extra loads. You may need a few extra pegs though.

#5 The sun is your best friend! I had heard that the sun would remove those stubborn stains but I didn't believe it, surely it was a myth. But no, IT'S TRUE! The sun is amazing. When at all possible, I hang my nappies out in the sun and the stains just disappear.  Winter will be a bit more of a challenge but I'll deal with that challenge when it arrives.

#6 Pamol can stain nappies. I'm just including this as I freaked out when suddenly these weird, greyish stains appeared on one of two of Miss A's nappies. At first I thought it was some sort of mould but after a little research, I discovered that pamol (or other medicines in different parts of the world) can create this discolouration. The nappies are clean and completely fine to sure and the stains will fade over time in the sun.

#7 Redbush tea is your other best friend. Okay this isn't actually linked to cloth nappies, just something I wanted to share. Redbush tea (or Rooibos tea if you're South African as I am) has so many amazing health properties and benefits. One that I stumbled across online is its ability to prevent nappy rash. I make a cup of tea, pour it into a spray bottle (it lasts for ages), and use a little at each nappy change. It is remarkable what a difference it makes as when I don't use, we deal with nappy rash far more often than when we do use it. Redbush tea can be found in most supermarkets in the normal tea section, or in the South African section if you're lucky enough to have one.

#8 Cloth wipes. When we first arrived home with Miss A, the thing that overwhelmed me most was using cloth wipes. I had them all ready to go, but I didn't have a system! How was I going to use them? How would I wet them without leaving Miss A unattended on the change table? Where would they go once they had been used? I was actually in tears that first afternoon as it was all too much. I do think that excessive hormones and having a tiny human being in the house for the first time may have contributed slightly to this though. After overcoming this initial obstacle, I love cloth wipes! I decided to use cloth wipes after hearing so many horror stories about the chemicals in wipes. You can buy cloth wipes or make your own, which is what I did. I simply found a sheet at an op shop (a soft, flannelette one is perfect) for a couple of dollars, cut it up and overlocked the edges. I recommend making the wipes a decent size (mine are about 25cm x 25cm) so you only need one each change and they easily cover your hand. I found a container which is next to the change table and I have a few wet wipes in here at a time. Once used, they go in with the nappies and as I'm already washing nappies, there is no additional washing. Another handy hint, buy two different sheets. This way, it is easy to distinguish between bum wipes and other wipes.

#9 Invest in a a wet bag. These are waterproof, washable bags which you can use for dirty nappies while out and about instead of using plastic bags. At home, the nappy and bag simply go into the wash (obviously taking the nappy out of the bag first!)

Finally, I thought I'd share which nappies I use you. I am not sponsored by these brands (if only!) and remember, every baby will suit different nappies  so your experience will be different to mine.

I have 2 types of nappies in my stash, one for the day and one for the night. Both types are one size fits all (OSFA) as I really didn't want to bother with buying 3 different sized nappies which is the alternative option. A slight side note before I continue, despite the name, generally OSFA nappies don't fit newborns so when I started, I brought a few small nappies from a second hand shop. I used these as I got used to cloth nappies and while deciding what nappy system to go with.

Peapods: These are my day nappies and I chose them for several reasons.

• They have adjustable elastic in the leg gussets. This means that as Miss A grows and goes through skinny or chubby phases, I simply adjust the legs to avoid leakages. 
• They can be used as snap in or pocket nappies. 99% of the time I use them as snap ins. This means that as long as the cover of the nappy is still dry, all I have to do is change the insert, definitely saving in washing. 
• They have a trifold insert which is really absorbent. As it unfolds, it is easy to dry (although they can still take a while) and the way in which it is designed means the top layer is a stay dry layer and the bottom 2 layers are bamboo, so quite absorbent. 
• They do up with snaps, making them difficult for little hands to undo. 

spots n bots: These are an Australian brand that my mum found at a market, designed by a mum for her baby. Since then the company has taken off. A few things I really like about them:

• They are a pocket style nappy which fit quite securely. I have only had one leak so far which was my fault as I put the  nappy on too loosely. 
• They close with Velcro, meaning that if a nappy change is necessary at night, I don't need to fiddle around with snaps.
• They easily fit several inserts so as Miss A grows, I can add additional boosters if necessary. Currently I use 2 inserts. One may be enough, I just have never tried, and right now I love the limited sleep I do get to risk it. 
• I love the feel of the fabric! They have a waterproof PUL minky cover which is very soft and micro-suede lining which keeps bubs feeling dry at night. 

So there we go, the end is in sight. I have done my best to contain myself on this topic, believe me, I could have written so much more! If you are still wavering about whether or not to use cloth nappies, they come with my husband's recommendation too. After overcoming his initial reluctance and receiving a short demonstration, he stated that he in fact found them far easier than disposables! That is quite something coming from a guy in my opinion. 

What is your experience with cloth nappies? I'd love to hear any tips you have to share? Leave a comment below or on my facebook page. Alternatively, if you have any questions, feel free to ask them too. 

A pretty white dress occasion

"Why, oh why am I doing this???" This was the thought constantly circulating through my mind last week as I contemplated preparing for Miss A's baby dedication. It all just seemed like too much work.

We only planned a small gathering, roughly 20 or so people, yet as the week wore on, the task appeared daunting - there was food and drink to organise, a meeting with the pastor to discuss the ceremony, a garden to get presentable and of course, a house to clean. None of it made any easier with the development of Miss A's first cold and her constant early morning wake ups (anything beginning with a 5 is not fondly welcomed in my eyes!).

Before I go on, I'd better explain what a baby dedication is. It's a little bit like a baby Christening but also a little bit different. Essentially it is a time when the parents declare their intention to raise their baby in the Christian faith and the baby is prayed over and blessed. Many baby dedications are held in churches but nowadays, they are also held in homes. We chose to do the latter option as for us, it was an occasion where we wanted the people who would be involved in raising Miss A present and they don't necessarily go to our church, or any church at all. 

As we have a small house we had hoped to hold the ceremony outside, hence the garden preparation. Come Saturday though, the weather was not in our favour. So much for all the gardening preparation! After pouring with rain all morning it was a big relief when the clouds parted and the sun made a welcome appearance in the afternoon. Preparations got under way, the furniture was pushed back, piles of stuff was dumped behind the closed door of our bedroom (or just in plain view in the corridor), bunting was hung and the food slowly made its way to the table. 

We were ready. 

Thankfully Miss A had a sleep before the occasion although even this didn't prevent the tears when confronted with so many people. Poor thing. I think that she may be like her mother and like quiet surroundings. Funnily enough, when it got to the part when she was up the front, she was perfectly happy to babble away and flash her smile at everyone. I finally got to dress her in something girly too...a pretty white dress I had purchased just for the occasion. In my wardrobe there are 2 special white dresses, my Christening dress and my wedding dress. Hopefully she'll get to have the same. Unfortunately, due to the cold weather, she ended up swamped under a cardy and wearing tights, with the end result that she looked rather like a fluffy marshmallow in my opinion.

The actual ceremony was short. Our pastor came along to lead it, he's a pretty chilled out guy which completely matched the occasion. He spoke for a few moments, my sister-in-law did a reading and then we talked briefly about the meaning of Miss A's name and our hopes as parents. We shared with those gathered that our desire was to raise Miss A in a home in which she learnt about Jesus but also saw him displayed in the way we lived our lives. We also talked about the idea that it takes a village to raise a child and invited those present to partner with us in raising Miss A, whether it be through prayer, encouragement, spending time with her or even disciplining her if she was acting up as she got older. After this, the pastor closed in prayer and that was that. We enjoyed some delicious food, fellowship with friends and in the case of my husband, brotherly antics that saw him with chilli covered burning face...not so pleasant. People slowly began leaving until it was just us, our parents and a lot to clean up. Thank goodness parents are so good at cleaning!

At the end of the day, while it was a lovely occasion, it seemed like a lot of effort and energy for such a short ceremony. 

However when I reflect on it, I think that the length in no way reflects the importance. It was in fact quite a significant occasion for many reasons. 

As parents, hubby and I had to think about how we want to raise Miss A (and future children). We took time, or grabbed time in between attempting to complete other tasks, to discuss this. I think the most important thing though was that we made a public declaration of our intention and invited others to partner with us. 

We live in an age where the idea of a village raising a child is something that has been somewhat lost. Instead, we live individualised lives and it is often now only the parents who hold all authority, for want of a better word. There is no village, no input from others and we all tread carefully so as not to impinge of anyone else's family. I know I have been in situations where I have wondered whether or not I am allowed to say something to a child who is behaving in a particular way that is not appropriate, especially when the mother is within earshot and hasn't said anything. Generally I opt not to say anything simply out of fear of offending the mother (or father if it is the father present). Is this the best option though? Yes everyone parents in a different way yet does that mean I or my child need to put up with disrespectful or dangerous behaviour simply to ensure social etiquette is maintained? 

As a teacher, when a child is in my classroom, I have no problem with this question as I know that having that child in the classroom comes with permission by parents to discipline their child (appropriately of course). Imagine if I couldn't? I'd end up with a class running riot and no one able to learn! Okay that might be a slight exaggeration but it is a very definite scenario depending on which children happen to be in the class. It is slightly trickier to discipline if the parent happens to be in the classroom at the time, perhaps doing parent help, and a child acts up and the parent says nothing as then it becomes a case of whose responsibility is it...or does the parent actually find that particular behaviour acceptable? Ultimately however, in my classroom, we have rules, we all know and agree on the rules and part of my job is ensuring these rules are followed through on. They're not rules for the sake of rules, but rather to ensure a safe and respectful environment for all who are present. 

Out of the classroom though and it's a different scenario. We live in an age of tolerance but we also live in an age of an expanding global population. There are more and more people who we cross paths with on a daily basis. More and more toes to tred on! How we live can directly impact others. Not all our decisions do of course but there are definitely some that do. I strongly believe that we have a responsibility to consider how our actions affect others. I don't mean that we have to alter our behaviour to ensure we are constantly pleasing others as that is in no way healthy, but we do need to think about whether we, or our children, are acting in a way that may cause harm to someone else or their property, because if we are, it's just not fair. I know life is not fair, but really, this is just not fair. It comes down to that age old idea of treating others in the way that you would like to be treated. 

Now of course, in New Zealand we don't live in villages. Our communities look very different to what they used to when it was just the people around you that made up your 'village'. So I didn't invite our entire suburb the baby dedication, that simply would have been impracticable and incredibly weird, but I did invite those whom I hope will be involved significantly in Miss A's life. I hope that through acknowledging their importance in our lives and inviting them to partner with us in bringing up Miss A, they will take on board this invitation and should Miss A ever act up in their presence (and let's be honest, that's more a when not an if), particularly if I'm not around, then they will feel comfortable to correct her behaviour. I want Miss A growing up knowing how to respectfully behave in different situations and with different people. Hopefully, this invitation will remove the doubt that I find myself faced with on occasion.

So will a village raise my child? I hope so! After all, if there is a village raising Miss A, that's a lot less work for me as the burden is shared and in addition, she gets a far richer upbringing as she interacts with different people, hopefully in a respectful way. That's a winning scenario for everyone I think.

That's my opinion though, I'd love to know your thoughts on the idea of others being involved in raising your child/ren? Let me know in the comments below or on my Facebook page.

Have a great week,
Trish xx

Being just a regular mum

Perhaps last week I shouldn't have shared my happiness at Miss A's ability to use the toilet as of course, this week, she has reversed proceedings and demonstrated an inability to not just use the toilet, but to go at all. The poor thing is suffering from constipation.

Just another of the regular challenges facing a mother.

After several days of no movements despite feeding her pear and prune puree, encouraging exercise and lots of tummy massage, Saturday saw her screaming in pain as she desperately tried to push with no results. Eek, what mother can stand that! Off to the A and E it was. I hate visiting the doctors, particularly as a new mother. I actually try my best to solve the problem before heading to the doctors as I constantly feel that I am the paranoid new mother turning up for no valid reason. Of course it is always better to be safe than sorry and I generally do feel better for the visit.  Anyway, hubby rang ahead and checked there was no queue while I bundled Miss A into the car and headed down the road, it's literally a 2 minute drive. Of course, in that 2 minutes, she stopped crying so come time for me to head to reception and explain my daughter was in pain, she was flashing her smile around and charming the pants off everyone. I felt like a fraud circling "severe pain" on the form! Once again, that 'paranoid new mother' sign was flashing away.

"Well you certainly make gorgeous babies", was the way I was greeted by the doctor. Um, thanks but slightly awkward! After a quick examination to ensure there was nothing else wrong plus a talk on constipation "just for my information" which included the fact that the majority of the population actually suffers from constipation without realising it and Kellogs All Bran is the best breakfast cereal to eat to prevent the problem, we were sent on our way with a script of some sugary medicine that should get things going.

Excellent.

New problem. Getting Miss A to take 5mls of this sugary substance. We attempted adding it to water, then adding it to food before finally holding her down and syringing in it. This child is stubborn. We eventually got most of it in. Problem solved we hoped.

By this time we were running behind schedule as we were due at a friend's house for the evening so off we went. I always dread a night out in which we have to settle Miss A at someone else's house. I love seeing people of course, it's just the settling part that is the issue as my first experience was not pleasant. It included a couple of hours of attempted settling, lots of tears from Miss A and an early exit by us with an overtired baby and a hungry, embarrassed and stressed out mother. In short, it was a total disaster! Thankfully, since then, she has settled the few times we have tried it but I still always worry that she won't.

Fortunately, despite the problems from earlier in the day, she settled without any problems. I sat down, relaxed, and looked forward to an evening with friends, particularly as this was a farewell for a couple moving overseas for 3 years.

The evening didn't go quite as planned unfortunately as just as we sat down for dinner, Miss A woke up. This is very out of character for her. In I went to resettle and out I went again. She was still awake. The process repeated and I eventually gave up when it was evident that she was not having a bar of it. Turns out that in the space of a few hours, she had developed a cold. Our first real cold!!! Another early exit for us as we headed home to get our bubs into bed.

The past few days have seen her battling this cold, not helped by the winter chill either. It has left me frustrated. I am used to a relatively chilled out baby, not a constantly clingy one who wants to be held all the time but when held is still unhappy being. There are so many things I have wanted/needed to get done this week with my parents visiting from Australia for a few days, Miss A's dedication at our place on Saturday and a garden in dire need of some attention before this event. Plus the general house work, sewing for Mubs, taxes to be calculated and the list goes on. Needless to say, not much has been achieved. Such is life. Our routines are out the window and I have just had to roll with it...something that I struggle with to say the least.

This cold continued to impact the household. On Tuesday it was hubby and my 4 year wedding anniversary. Thankfully the weather 4 years ago was far milder than it was on Tuesday as we married in a lovely outdoor ceremony in fairly balmy autumn weather. Anyway, the initial celebration plan to mark the event was a nice, candlelit dinner at home. However, come Tuesday, hubby was now down with a cold too and I was feeling slightly jaded so we canned the plans and instead ate left over chicken soup and headed to bed at 8.30pm for a romantic evening of actual sleep...well that was my plan. Hubby slept and I had to wait for Miss A to resettle after coughing herself awake. So much for an early night.

The following morning dawned as one of those freezing mornings when all you want to do is snuggle up under the warm blankets and shut out the world. Of course, Miss A had other plans, treating me to another early morning wake up and so instead of remaining in my lovely warm bed I instead found myself donning my dressing gown and entering the cold reality of the morning to get her up.

So why am I sharing these experiences with you? For no particular reason really except to say life is not glamorous. Well not mine anyway. I am a mother doing motherly things. That means life revolves around a certain little person, this week even more so than usual. That is the reality of being a mum. Not losing yourself completely, but priorities do shift. There is a little helpless person now in my care. She can't walk. She can't talk. She can't put extra blankets on herself when she's cold. She doesn't know how to lie in bed and get better when she has a cold. She can't dose herself up. She can't google the answer to her problems. She can't get herself up in the mornings, feed herself or basically do anything at all for herself.

She needs me to help her.

That is my job.

It will evolve. She'll gradually learn to do all these things and will need me less, or need me in a different way, but for now, she is completely reliant on me so what I want/need will have to take a back seat. That is what it means to be a mum. I'm sure in the vast majority of homes around the world, the same situation will be found. We are all in good company.

If you find yourself in a similar situation to me this week, be encouraged by this reminder.

My baby is a genius...

I discovered something new today. While feeding Miss A her lunch, I noticed that she was making what I can only describe as a deep grizzly sound. She often makes this noise while eating and it is also often accompanied by a refusal to eat for a bit. I've always thought that perhaps she was getting frustrated at having to sit in her high chair or was getting bored of eating. Today though, she made the sound and I offered her water. She immediately drank some and then opened her mouth for some more food. After another spoonful, she started up the grizzling sound again. Once again I gave her water, she drank it and then opened her mouth to eat more. This happened again and I responded in the same way. Then she just continued to eat, no more grizzling for a while. It dawned on me that she was telling me she wanted water! Amazing. I wrote last week about how babies communicate and it seems I am continuing to learn more and more. I love the moments when the light bulb finally comes on for me and I make the connection between what she is doing and what she is actually telling me.

I also love watching Miss A learning to make her own connections. Of course there are lots of amazing physical things that she has already learnt and that have been easy to see - smiling, rolling, flailing, sitting. We're not at crawling yet thank goodness. Slight side note but I am really enjoying our current sitting phase. Finally my arms are free and yet I know that I can put her down and she will stay there, well in the vicinity anyway as she is a pretty pro roller, so I am definitely in no rush for progressing to the crawling phase.

While all these physical changes are awesome, I really enjoy seeing the mental connections occurring. Perhaps it is the teacher in me that is trained to look for connections? I'm not sure, but they're pretty cool so I thought I'd share a few of my favourite observations.

My absolute favourite is the fact my little girl does at least 90% of her poos over the toilet. This has been a learnt behaviour which has required work on both our parts. It's not toilet training though, it's more that we're both learning to read signals. As I've gotten older (and wiser?) I've become quite fascinated by other cultures and how they go about their daily lives as I believe there is a lot we can learn from them. Before I was even pregnant, I began thinking about the fact that the majority of the developing world can't afford nappies and yet you don't see mothers walking around covered in all sorts of undesirable bodily fluids which left me wondering what their secret was. After a bit of research, I found Elimination Communication. Essentially this method is based on what happens in the developing world. Mothers learn to read the signs their babies make when they need to go to the toilet and cue them with a sound e.g. 'sssss'. In the western world we give it a name, in the developing world it's just the norm. This made a lot of sense to me so from the time Miss A was a few weeks old I began holding her over the toilet (holding her legs with her back against my stomach) and making a 'ssss' sound. Almost immediately, she would wee over the toilet, sometimes even poo (note: a definite sign of a parent when you can nonchalantly discuss poos and wees). Amazing! We've progressed to the point where the majority of nappy changes see me holding her over the toilet and almost immediately, if she needs to poo, she will, without me even cuing. We're not so good on the wees, but that is probably because I haven't learnt to read her signs...something to work on I suppose. When I tell people about this, they are amazed, disbelieving really. Yet it is credit to Miss A, she has made the connection between the toilet and her needs and it has been amazing to watch, particularly as there are times when I have wondered whether we would ever get to this point!

Another connection she has made, and is still fine tuning, is closing her eyes when going underwater. This has come as result of our swimming lessons where, through much repetition of a certain phrase (name, ready, go), babies are cued to close their eyes as they have water poured over them or they go under water. We've only been swimming a term and yet, on cue, she has learnt to close her eyes. We practice in the shower or when having a bath too. So my little girl,  who can't talk and I imagine has has limited understanding of what is being said, has made the connection between a set of words and the action she needs to perform. Wow!

Going back to the eating thing, Miss A has learnt that a spoon signals food. She's known this for a while. Given that she has 3 meals a day, there is a lot of repetition going on here which obviously makes it easier. Yet when I think back to the fact she's been eating for less than 2 months, it's amazing what she has learnt. When first presented with a spoon she had no idea that it contained food, let alone how to get the food off and then how to swallow it. Now she opens her mouth at the site of the spoon. In the past couple of days, I have watched as she has grabbed for the spoon, clumsily turned it around to face her and then put the spoon in her mouth to eat some food. Generally there is not much food on the spoon at this point, as even if I had been kind enough to let her take a spoon heaped with food, by the time she had rotated it to face her, the fact she turns it upside down in the process would ensure more food ended up on her than in her mouth. Yet it is the connection she has made through her experience of eating that once again amazes me.

Finally, I love the connections she has made that allow us to play games. According to my weekly email from Baby Centre, she should enjoy turn taking games. I'm not sure we're quite up to that stage yet but she certainly enjoys games we can both play. Peek-a-boo is a favourite. I'm not sure when she first clicked that she could play yet now she is a pro, hiding her face behind a cloth or her top then pulling it away after I've been questioning where she is to reveal she is in fact still there. CUTE! Of course I do it to her too, hiding behind all sorts of objects, as do other people, and she absolutely loves it. As she develops further I know she'll outgrow this but for the moment, I marvel in the fact that she's developed to the point where she can join in for herself. Another game we play is one where I pretend to eat her, often leaving her in fits of giggles. Just in the last week she has joined in and now pretends to eat me too. By 'eat' I mean have her mouth open on my shoulder, cheek, head or stomach generally. When she does it, it leaves me giggling too.

Calling my baby a genius might is a slight over exaggeration, but let's be honest, she, like most babies, is so much smarter than we give them credit for! They learn so much in such a short space of time. They are constantly watching us. It's actually scary to think how much they are learning by watching us! Yet at the same time it is awesome.

I would love to hear some of the connections you have seen your baby make so leave a comment below or on my Facebook page.

The mystery of the poo on the carpet

"Do you know anything about the poo in the lounge?" This was the text I sent my husband last Friday morning. I had walked into the lounge to find a rather solid looking poo on the carpet. At first I thought it must be mud but closer examination revealed it was most definitely poo. So how exactly did it get there? My husband had no idea. We don't have dogs. My baby was still in her cot so it couldn't be her. Could it be the cat? Surely not. It did not look like cat poo. Had he brought it in perhaps? I started considering even more unlikely possibilities...had someone snuck into our house and pooed on the floor? It was bizarre, it was a mystery. Photos were taken and the research began. To cut a long story short, it turned out that the guilty party was in fact our cat, Ranga. But why? He turned up later, tail between his legs, looking decidedly dejected and miserable.I put it down to being ashamed and embarrassed. However he really was not himself so hubby whisked him off to the vet. It turned out that the poor thing had somehow found himself the owner of an infected bite on his tail and had a fever. As antibiotics on their own didn't do the job, he had to undergo sedation, have a drain inserted, is now under house arrest and is very unhappily sporting a cone around his head. Why am I sharing this with you? Well the thing that amazed me most through this was the way he let us know that he was unwell. He pooed in the lounge. It worked. We knew something wasn't right before we even saw him that day.  

I have been similarly amazed by the ability of my daughter to communicate her needs with me. At 6.5 months old she has obviously not quite developed the ability to talk yet but through her actions she has passed on many messages. There's simple ones that we're all familiar with. Crying for tired, hungry or nappy change. However there are more complex behavior changes that have often, unfortunately, taken me a while to decode. Once I do (if I do), her behaviors suddenly make total sense. I've heard it said that babies are illogical but the more I learn, the more logical I think they are. Well mine is anyway, I can't really talk for anyone else. 

The first time I really encountered this was when my daughter, Miss A, was 9 weeks old. Now I am a first time parent so life is a continual learning curve at the moment. Up until this point, she had been a relatively good sleeper. However her day sleeps began to reduce in length until suddenly every nap was 45 minutes long with no resettling despite my best efforts. I spent many hours researching and attempting different solutions but nothing worked. At the same time, the majority of the times I tried to feed her, she would feed for 1 to 2 minutes before screaming and pushing away. It was awful. I didn't know what to do. I was scared to go out with her because of the fuss she'd make screaming. Plus I worried she wasn't getting enough food. I took her to the doctor who suggested it could be reflux and prescribed something for it. In my gut I really didn't believe this was the problem though so chose not to give her the medication. Fortunately for me, Sharlene Poole, New Zealand's baby whisperer, came to my coffee group around this time. During her discussions with the group she solved both my problems. Firstly, I simply was not keeping Miss A awake long enough. I thought that I was doing the right thing reading her tired signs when I saw a yawn and putting her to bed, but in fact she was signalling to me that she was bored! After 45 minutes of sleep, she'd simply had enough and didn't need anymore. Once I increased her awake time and ensured she was appropriately stimulated, our naps began to lengthen once more, or at least a resettle was possible. As for the feeding, her screaming was her way of saying, "Mum I really don't want any more food!" As I fed on waking and she had been having shorter naps, she was now getting fed more often which she clearly she did not want or appreciate. I changed the feeding schedule and she began feeding without any problems again. Both solutions were incredibly logical in hindsight.

The 45 minute sleep issues have returned again over the past week. This time though, I knew it was not linked to awake times as I had already consulted the Baby Whispering book by Sharlene Poole (which I had quickly purchased after Sharlene solved my last problems and has become my baby 'go to' book which I can not recommend highly enough.) I had tried adjusting awake times, changing what she was wearing to sleep, altering when I fed her, but nothing worked. I could not get a sleep longer than 45 minutes and I could not get any resettles. Finally I consulted my book again and found something I had overlooked. Sharlene stated that 45 minute naps were quite common at this age (6-7 months) and were often linked to day time routines and also the possibility of a baby being hungry. As my little girl is on 3 solid meals a day plus milk, I really did not think this was the issue but the next time she woke from yet another 45 minute sleep I fed her then put her back down. 1.5 hours later she woke up! The poor thing had been hungry. Her resistance to napping longer was simply due to the fact her little tummy was not full enough to sustain her, despite the meals she was getting. I have now altered what she eats at each meal in an attempt to bulk it out and we are beginning to get the longer naps again. Another logical problem and solution...in hindsight.  

The final example I'll share is another linked to sleep (oh how sleep rules the life of a mother!). This time it was night sleep. Unfortunately I do not have a girl who sleeps through the night (by this I mean 12 hours) but generally she is pretty good and will only wake once. However she started waking every couple of hours. This began to drive me crazy, particularly given I was now not getting much sleep. She wasn't teething, she wasn't sick, it wasn't a growth spurt, nothing had changed during the day. I searched in my book but no answer so I turned to good old Google. On this occasion, Google helped me work out what was going on. The days had been hotter and I hadn't upped my water intake. This combined with the fact that she was getting hot at night because she was reaching the limits of her bassinet (even though it looked like she had a lot of room left) meant she was thirsty at night. Once I addressed both these issues, her sleeping returned to normal. Another logical problem and solution. 

As they say, hindsight is a beautiful thing. Have I found the logical solution to all problems? No. If I had, perhaps I could write a best selling book and be rich! I'm beginning to believe that there is a logical solution for each problem though. Whether I uncover them or not remains to be seen but hopefully I'll have more successes than failures. Otherwise little Miss A will be left very frustrated at the inability of her mother to interpret her very clear communications, well in her opinion anyway.